Sunday, May 29, 2011

summer sun.

The clear, pure light of the morning made me long for the truth in my heart, which alone could make me pure and clear as the morning, tune me up to the concert-pitch of the nature around me. 
And the wind that blew from the sunrise made me hope in the God who had first breathed into my nostrils the breath of life; that He would at length so fill me with His breath, His mind, His Spirit, that I should think only His thoughts, and live His life, finding therein my own life, only glorified infinitely. 
What should we poor humans do without our God's nights and mornings? 
--George MacDonald


Sunday, May 8, 2011

momma bear

so, today is the day we get to celebrate our mothers.
my momma is the best of them all in my eyes.
born and raised in Lubbock, with her sweet little West-Texas drawl that comes out to play every once in a while, she is easily described with one word.


i've always said this about my mom, and as i grow older it becomes clearer and clearer where her joy lies.
my mom is in love with her family. she is in love with my dad. and what girl could ask for anything more than that? right?
she is resilient. and committed. to me. and to my sisters. and to my dad.
she cooks meals with such ease, and every time we sit down for dinner, im amazed again that the bread, and the broccoli and the chicken and the potoatoes are all finished cooking. at the exact same moment. its like a miracle.
shes talented.
she loves to give gifts. 
she loves to organize special moments and special things to make sure everyone around her knows how much they are loved.
my mom is emotional. she'd say "noooo im not!" but seriously. she'll cry about just about anything. thus, me and my two sisters do the same.
my mom loves Bonnie (our dog). she'll act annoyed daily. but really, bonnie is her pal. and she talks to her when she thinks no one is around.
my mom is fun. way more fun than i am. way way way more fun.
she is honest. and she never tries to be anyone shes not.
she loves to see the world. a passion she has given me for sure. and she's up for going anywhere. anytime. and I LOVE IT.

the best thing i can say about my mom is that she is warm. she loves her daughters, and her granddaughters, and her son-in-law, and her husband, and her parents, and her siblings, and her nieces and nephews.
she is full of love.
love is her priority.

 so, momma. Thanks for teaching me what it means to be committed to my family. to be patient and willing to listen and be okay with being wrong. for encouraging me to live a life that is full, and to go after the things that I want. thanks for being at every choir concert, and being the president of the booster club, and for driving back and forth between waco and dallas numerous times. thank you for being such a great mom. for singing show tunes with me in the car. and meeting me for lunchs, all the time. and for dancing with me in the living room. and thanks for laughing till you cry. because it makes me laugh until i cry. and thats my favorite thing.
 i love you momma bear.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

to kelsbels and jilly

kelsey, me and jillian
tonight was a night of goodness. of hope. and of first real realizations that this season of my life is coming to an end. quickly.

my sweet, beautiful best friends kelsey and jillian sang their last set as college students at Common Grounds tonight.
to say it was bittersweet doesn't quite explain or illustrate the welling up in my little marsha heart.
I remember, freshman year, walking down 8th street with jillian, her voice was shaky. she was about to do something so crazy. something she would have never thought she'd do. play an open mic. sing in front of people. she was terrified. i was terrified for her. it was epic.
she played songbird. and suitcase. and marsha's lullaby. songs that I could now easily sing every word to. songs that i've heard (with much happiness) a million times over. songs that define. that are the soundtrack to me as a little blonde baylor college girl. and even as a soon to be grad. all grown up and heading out into this great big world.

jillian kept playing. kelsey always beautifully by her side. people started listening. and before we all knew it, jill had found her heart song. her dream job. everything she wanted to do with the rest of her life. and a way to share the love of Jesus in her heart. with the world.
through house of blues shows and chapel songs. and rained out CD releases. and random college station road trip shows. with whataburger after every single one.
through it all. she has sung beautifully.
jillian is the dearest friend. the person in my life who actually laughs when i say things that I seriously think are funny. i speak up for her. she sits silently for me. she is the ying to my yang.
she is there. she speaks my love language and has never failed. she rides with me at 1:00 am to get food...(gross, I know..?)
she sits with me in my studio and watches me paint. even though its weird.
she is the one who sips wine for 10 hours. and sits with me on the couch in the pi phi room during rush when im SO over it.
we match. and its never on purpose.
and sometimes switch identities. and wear eachother's clothes.
she listens to music on the loudest volume with me. and rolls down the windows. and drives the baylor campus 10 times just because its such a freaking gooooood song.
she hates fro yo. i love it. it works. ya know?
she hates having dirty hands. i hate having dirty feet.
she talks to me when i sleep talk. even though its the creepiest thing in the world. (sorry bout that.)
she in love with happiness. but has learned so well how to cry.
i love to cry. and she has taught me how to laugh.
she will sit with me for hours and analyze people. of the Enneagram, there is nothing more intriguing.
at every function, we maintain that dancing involves no male figures. there will only be us. and we will look like idiots. but who cares.
she loves to love people. she has taught me so much about what that means. to love people.
Jillian is moving far away. but i don't fear. tears may be shed at the separation of such epic friendship. but no no. there will be daily phone convos. there will be cheap southwest airlines flights. and over night roadtrips to nashville from dallas. there will be much more. this is not the end.
dear friend. you are a twinkle light. you are quiet and soft and lovely. and you draw people in with your glow. i love you dearly. dearly dearly dearly.

Kelsey Taylor.

Yes, she is my lifelongest friend. we met as little girls. wore big sunday school dresses. decided we were going to be the coolest/baddest girls at children's camp, that were "waaaay more mature than everyone else". she was the person who i first painted with. she is my creative person. the person who understands it all. my crazy brain. she gets it.
kelsey has seen me through it all. through crazy familyness. and falling in love. and deep deep heart break. through big adventures. and through the painfully mundane.
she is the wisest. she is the most completely beautiful. she is timeless. nothing shakes her. and for my entire life, that is a person I have leaned on.
Kelsey makes sure I do things right. She sings me (with her most beautiful voice i've ever heard voice) to sleep, patty griffin style, when I have tears rolling down my cheeks.
she reminds me that its not cool to do what everyone else does.
she makes me remember that i am worth so much more than I sometimes realize.
and she loves harry.
so she makes me love harry. and Hogwarts.
she wears black like a champ. and looks like a goddess every the time. (jealous? yes!)
and will always be my wine drinking buddy.  ALWAYS.
Dallas will be good. i cant wait to watch our families grow up together. i can't wait.
if i could describe kelsey with one little word. it would be "gem'.
she is and always has been and always will be the gem of my life. she is faceted. she reminds me what beautiful is. she makes me remember. every day. even when we are apart. what life means. to live real.
dearest kels bels. lets be stormy. forever.

to my two friends. you are my heartsong. and i dont know who i'd be without you.
fullest of love,

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

the light

Oh, if only we would worry less about our problems and sing and praise more! 
There are thousands of things that shackle us 
that could be turned into instruments of music, if we just knew how to do it.
Oh that we might sing morning and evening, 
offering up song after song of continual praise throughout our day! 
-streams in the desert